Ten Tips for Working with Your Spouse
By Barbara FrankThe news about the economy just keeps getting worse. Those who haven't already lost their job are feeling a bit paranoid about keeping the one they have. This is pretty scary stuff for homeschooling families, many of whom rely on one income as it is.
Some homeschool families are starting small businesses, either on the side or to replace a husband's lost income, in order to keep the family finances in good shape. This is a great idea, and can be a good learning experience for the entire family. The nucleus of such a business is usually a married couple, working closely together.
Fifteen years ago, my husband came home to work. He ran his own business for many years while also running Cardamom Publishers with me. A few years back his business succumbed to the offshoring of work in his industry to China. Now he's started a new business, plus he still works with Cardamom. Thus we've spent 15 years (half of our marriage!) working together at home. It's been a wonderful experience!
Just as homeschooling your children helps you develop a deeper relationship with them, working with your spouse can bring the two of you even closer than you already are. Despite responsibilities that can include child-rearing, homeschooling, running a household, and church and community involvement, your relationship can thrive while the two of you run a business together.
However, as in any collaborative effort, the road to success requires some ground rules. Here are ten tips that promote marital and corporate bliss:
- 1) Capitalize on your gifts—each of you brings different talents to the table. It doesn't really matter who's more gifted with finances and who's more creative. Find out who's good at what, and assign responsibilities appropriately.
- 2) Consult each other on the big issues—in some areas, you and your spouse will have different viewpoints. The two of you should always share your opinions and feelings before making important business decisions.
- 3) Avoid micro-managing—if you consult each other on every little question and concern, you won't have enough time to get everything done. Establish procedures in areas such as packing and shipping, preparing for conventions, and obtaining office supplies. Having set procedures will be especially helpful for training your children or future employees to work in the business.
- 4) Work together to achieve a balance—both of you are responsible for your family, your home, your business and homeschooling. If these responsibilities aren't divided fairly, somebody's going to burn out. Parents can and do share homeschooling, housekeeping and childcare; if their children are old enough to help, parents should also share the responsibility for delegating chores. Husbands who come home to work may have to help more around the house, while their wives may have to relinquish certain areas they've been responsible for in order to participate in the business. Every situation is different. Don't worry about how other couples do it: find out what works for you and your spouse.
- 5) Maintain mutual respect—The two of you have more opportunities for communication than most couples, and that means more opportunities to argue, if you're not careful. Speaking to each other respectfully must be the rule no matter how much pressure you're under from your business, your family, or anything else. Don't forget that your children are watching; you're setting the example for their future marriages and work relationships.
- 6) Encourage each other—When business is booming and hectic, plow through it together. When business is slow, be optimistic. No matter what the status of your business is at any given time, foster an atmosphere of shared enthusiasm.
- 7) Establish a financial accord—decide together how much spending should go on. If slow-payers have paralyzed your cash flow, shop carefully for needs and postpone wants until those checks arrive. Once they do, decide together how much to spend and how much to save or invest.
- 8) Count your blessings—never lose sight of the intangible benefits of your family business. Most families don't share their days and their meals. In fact, most parents come home from work each day too exhausted to even read or play with their children for more than a few minutes. Don't let yourself forget that being home together every day is a great blessing.
- 9) Stay available to your children—make sure there is always someone in charge for the children to go to for help in everything from settling disputes to asking permission. That person may be Mom, Dad, an older child, a relative or a friend, depending on the time of day and what's going on. No matter what's happening in the business, the children's needs must not be ignored.
- 10) Remember the Sabbath—as with all of God's commandments, you benefit by obeying them. A day spent with your family in worship and rest allows everyone to recharge, and to remember Who's in charge. Take a break from your roles as worker and teacher, and relax. Don't worry about how a day off will affect business; let God handle those details. Resist the temptation to work, and you'll set a good example for your family.