Saving Time and Money with Stashes

Posted on October 19, 2012 by Barb

Gas is nearly $4.00 a gallon here in northeast Wisconsin. My husband and I are fortunate that we both work at home, so we don’t have commuting expenses. But there are still many places we have to go.

With the nearest large city an hour away, we’re trying to conserve gas by combining trips there. For example, if I need to take someone to the doctor for a check-up, I think ahead to which stores I pass by on the way home, where I can pick up needed items as long as I’m in the neighborhood.

I’m also being careful about how many short trips I make around our little town. I don’t go to the library unless I also need to stop by the bank, which is a few blocks over. I put book orders to be shipped in my bike basket and ride to the post office, unless I have a heavy box of books to ship. These activities help me save gas.

But what’s really helped us limit the amount of driving we’re doing these days is something I’ve done for years: keeping stashes. Ever since my kids were little, I’ve stockpiled doubles or triples of items we use frequently. There’s nothing like the 3 am discovery that your baby has a high fever and you’ve run out of fever reducer to make you realize that it’s really smart to keep spares of such things on hand.

I have a lot of stashes in my house (I describe them in detail in The Imperfect Homeschooler’s Guide to Homeschooling), and they’ve made my life as a mom and homemaker much easier, while also saving money. But now that the price of gas is so high compared to just a few years ago, I find that the stash concept is saving me more money than ever.

To start a stash, you buy two of every item you use regularly in your household. This means you always have a spare, and don’t waste gas or time running out for a last minute replacement. Besides, you’re going to use the same amount of gas going back and forth to the store whether you buy two bottles of ketchup or one. So why not buy two? (Take this concept a step further by only buying these items when they’re on sale, and you’re now reducing your grocery bills as well as the amount of gasoline that you use.)

One important thing to remember about stashes is that they don’t work if you don’t remember to buy items before you need them. Train yourself, your husband and your children that when you open something new, you put it on the shopping list (you do keep a shopping list somewhere that’s easily accessible, I hope!). Be warned: it may take a while to train the rest of the family to do this.

The only problem I’ve ever had with this system is that I became so used to it that I couldn’t stop, even after two of our four children moved out. Our supply soon far exceeded our demand.

That’s why, for the past few years, I tried to stop buying multiples of staples because we weren’t using them up fast enough. But now I find that my stashes let me go much longer without driving to the store, thus saving a considerable amount of gasoline.

So I’ve stopped chiding myself for keeping a stash for only four people. As long as we make an effort to use up what we have and keep a list of what we need, I can easily go two weeks without a major shopping trip. That saves me gas and time. Time is always very valuable, and gas is becoming more so every day, it seems. Why not try it yourself and see if it doesn’t work for you, too?

Life Changes

Posted on October 12, 2012 by Barb

Lately I’ve been posting the homeschooling articles from my old website here every Friday. There are two reasons for that: one is that people still ask for them, and the other is that I’m just too busy to post anything else 🙂

Who knew that life after homeschooling would keep me so busy? I’ve been sewing like a maniac because my first grandchild is due any day and I just had to make him a bunting, a crib sheet and a quilt. I’ve been in a Bible study about spiritual gifts (so interesting!) and have become the finance secretary at my church, so those things have taken some time. And of course I’m still chief cook and housekeeper here at our cozy little home; it takes a lot less time to keep up this place than the five-bedroom house took, but it still requires some effort (and regular weeding-out of stuff) to keep things in good shape around here.

Add to this the fact that my husband got a job after being out of work for five years, thus putting me back in charge of the daily activities of our rambunctious 19-year-old (who has Down syndrome), and I guess it’s not so surprising that I’m a lot busier than I thought I would be once I was done homeschooling our four kids.

Note what’s missing here: I haven’t been writing. I have a couple of e-Books to finish but I just don’t have the desire right now. I’ve been praying for direction and the only definitive thing that’s happened is that someone offered my husband a job! So I’m sitting tight, keeping busy and looking forward to being a certain little fella’s grandma very soon.

How about you? What’s new in your neck of the woods? If you’d rather not post it in the comments section, you can always email me, you know 🙂

Homeschooling to Prevent Rebellion

Posted on October 12, 2012 by Barb

One of the many reasons I wanted to homeschool is that I didn’t want rebellious teenagers.

The homeschool magazine I read back then (before there were many homeschool magazines at all) was great for keeping me enthused and inspired about homeschooling before I was even doing it. The articles in it assured me that as long as my kids were homeschooled in a Christian home where God’s Word was taught, there would be no rebellion. In fact, more than one writer insisted that teen rebellion is not only unbiblical, but is also a product of our society, unique to our modern times.

I bought that argument completely. Besides, I was so busy keeping up with my growing family that I didn’t have time to consider the biblical stories of the Prodigal Son (rebellion) and the behavior of the Israelites in the desert (repeated rebellion). All I knew is that I didn’t want my kids to become the self-absorbed teens I’d seen in our extended family, our church and our neighborhood.

Fast-forward to 2004. I’m one of the veteran homeschoolers in my support group, where I meet homeschooling newbies who love their adorable little ones so much, who enjoy their innocence to such an extent, that they fear what will happen when their children hit their teens. One recently told me, “I can’t bear the thought that they will change into people I don’t like!”

This presents me with a dilemma. I can whitewash my response so the newbies can stay in their comfort zone, or I can be honest and risk a “shoot the messenger” situation. So if you, dear reader, want to stay in your comfort zone, I suggest you click over to another page of this site. You’re not going to like the rest of this article, because the truth is, even when you’re Christian, even when you homeschool and study the Bible together and pray together, and even when you do all those things and Dad works at home and is involved in your children’s lives on a daily basis, you will still have rebellious teenagers.

Maybe.

The thing is, it depends on the teen. I’ve seen homeschooled teens sail through those years as calmly as though nothing had changed. I’ve also seen kids from wonderful Christian families turn into scary-looking, sullen people. I’ve even seen both of these happen in my own home.

The word “seen” is important, though, when it comes to teens, because what you see may or may not be what you get. Inside the young lady with the ever-changing hair color and pierced eyebrow may beat the heart of someone who is passionate about the unborn and has a sincere concern for the underprivileged of this world. Conversely, inside the young lady wearing the flowered jumper and no makeup may beat the heart of someone who is just biding her time until she is old enough to jump ship and live life her way, no matter how unbiblical her way may be.

What’s a parent to do? It’s scary to think that the loving, sweet-natured six-year-old who lives in your house may turn into someone you don’t like eight or ten years from now. What will you do if that happens?

The answer is to love that child anyway. Love is a verb, you know. No matter what you feel inside when you see your formerly winsome child with a snarl, or funny-looking hair, or even a face covered with zits, you love them with your words and with your actions (which include discipline, but that’s another article in itself). You love them even when you don’t feel very loving towards them. It’s not easy. I don’t think it can even be done without lots of prayer. But it must be done.

Because the rebellion, the strange clothes and behavior, the gangly appearance-these things will pass. For some kids, rebellion is part of the process of separating from the family. We parents know we are here to work ourselves out of a job by raising kids who grow into independent adults. Some kids can make that transition smoothly, while others have to fight their way to independence. And even the kids who sail through their teen years often surprise you with a few rebellious issues when they reach young adulthood and are out of your reach. Still, as the saying goes, this too will pass. They come through on the other side as mature versions of the little people you once knew, but this time without the dependency on Mom and Dad.

So if you’re homeschooling because you don’t want rebellious teens, I’m sorry to tell you there are no guarantees. But if you’re homeschooling because you love your kids, then you’re on the right track, because practice in loving your kids can only help. You may have to face a time where you discover that despite your best efforts, despite years of homeschooling and a loving Christian home environment, your child has turned into someone you don’t always like very much. But hang in there and keep loving that “someone” anyway, because the best is yet to come.

“….he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” Philippians 1:6 (NIV).

Note: If you are struggling with a rebellious teen, I highly recommend the book Prodigals and Those Who Love Them: Words of Encouragement for Those Who Wait by Ruth Bell Graham.

Excerpted from Stages of Homeschooling: Letting Go (Book 3), available HERE.

A Homeschool Mom’s Paradise

Posted on October 5, 2012 by Barb

Picture a quiet room where you stand surrounded by shelves full of homeschooling books and curriculum. In the middle of the room there is a table flanked by comfortable chairs, where you can sit and flip through everything you’ve ever wanted to use to with your children: history books, math curriculum and that great new writing program you read about recently.

There is such a place, and it’s called the Homeschool Mom’s Paradise. (Ok, I’m kidding, but that is what it feels like.) It’s actually called the Homeschool Resource Center. Unlike homeschool convention exhibit halls, where most homeschoolers spend hours on their feet studying homeschool products, you don’t have to pay to enter. The Homeschool Resource Center is located in the midst of a public library. All you need is a current library card to borrow anything you want from the center for six weeks.

Located in the Johnsburg (Illinois) Public Library, the Homeschool Resource Center is the brainchild of homeschool mom Kathy Wentz. In 2001, Kathy established the center with the help of librarian Maria Zawacki and a $55,000 grant from the Illinois State Library.

Kathy spent countless hours choosing books, magazines, curriculum, games and equipment to lend to area homeschoolers. She added telescopes, microscopes, test tubes and other equipment for the scientifically minded. Math manipulatives and foreign language tapes were also purchased.

It didn’t take very long to use up $55,000. Since then, Kathy has raised money to fund new items for the center by organizing used curriculum sales. The proceeds allow Kathy to pick and choose among the many new products constantly being developed for the homeschool market; she knows savvy moms will be looking for them.

Kathy also spends one evening each week at the Homeschool Resource Center, offering free consulting to homeschoolers looking for help or advice. The donation of her time in this way is part of her ongoing commitment to the center, which she says is something her faith has led her to do. She has been gratified to see the enthusiastic response of not just local homeschoolers, but also those who come from some distance and make a day out of their visit.

If you are excited by the thought of having a homeschool resource center in your own community, perhaps you may feel led to establish something similar. Kathy says that while informing other homeschoolers about this concept is good, what’s most important is informing librarians. They need to know that this concept works, and that it is needed by their patrons. Most homeschoolers are frequent visitors to public libraries, and will use such a valuable resource regularly.

In order to promote the idea on a national and even international level, Kathy has written articles published in library journals that have garnered positive responses from librarians. So if you approach your own library about starting a homeschool resource center, you may find that your librarian has already heard of the concept and has been waiting for a patron to ask for it.

For more information about Johnsburg’s Homeschool Resource Center visit the Johnsburg Public Library’s website (where you can access the Homeschool Resource Center’s resource list). Kathy Wentz may be contacted via email at kwentz8992 (at) comcast (dot) net.

Making Time to be Alone

Posted on September 28, 2012 by Barb

We all need time alone. We need time to think, to dream, and to create….without relentless interruptions from our children.

Finding time to be alone is especially difficult for those of us who homeschool, because we’re with our children so much. But we aren’t superhuman, no matter what outsiders may think. We need to be refreshed. The hard part is figuring out how to do that.

It sure gets easier once your children are older. I recently found that one of the quickest ways to find myself alone is to put on my DVD, Josh Groban’s “Live at the Greek” (or, as my husband calls it, “Live at the Geek.”) You should see my loved ones scatter when it comes on! Another surefire road to solitude is my collection of Doris Day movies. The opening credits of “That Touch of Mink” send my kids flying out of the room as if it were on fire.

Still, it wasn’t always so easy to find myself alone. There was a time when I was outnumbered 4 to 1, and I couldn’t even go to the bathroom without someone banging on the door with some real or imagined emergency. Back then, I truly believed I would never be alone again. If only I had bought those Doris Day videos sooner…..

My point here is that you must carve out some regular time alone for yourself to prevent homeschool burnout, a very real occurrence that you’ll want to avoid. Some homeschool moms feel guilty for wanting time to themselves. Don’t! Even Jesus took time to be alone and pray….it’s important to regroup when you need to.

Working moms have time alone while commuting and on their lunch breaks. Most stay-at-home moms experience time alone once they send their children off to school, which these days can be as early as age two. But those of us who homeschool are never alone, it seems, especially during the early years of raising our families. (I love sleep, but I actually enjoyed waking up for middle-of-the-night feedings of my third and fourth babies because the house was quiet and no one was talking to me!)

Believe it or not, there will come a time when you can be alone for minutes, even hours, at a time, on a regular basis! But if that’s far down the road for you, don’t wait that long. Try to schedule some time for yourself now, when you really need it. Snag your husband, a close friend or Grandma to keep track of the kids, and set a date for your time alone.

You can start small, by going for a walk alone. Doing the grocery shopping is much easier and quicker if you do it by yourself. Find a Ladies’ Bible study that keeps its meetings brief. (I joined my church’s hour-long evening class when my youngest was six months old—what a blessing! I ended up attending that class every week for 14 years.)

As your family becomes accustomed to Mom’s little breaks, stay out a little longer. Take an exercise class, or a crafts class. It’s a nice break to be the student instead of the teacher. Find another mom and go out for coffee and chat. The time will fly!

Whatever you do, try to enjoy yourself. Don’t feel guilty if there were tears when you left the house. They may cry, but the kids need a break from you, too. Besides, they’ll appreciate you more when you come back.

(Excerpted from Stages of Homeschooling (Book 1): Beginnings, available HERE.)